Oaks and Willows

ByDr. Berney

Oaks and Willows

Willow

As we dive head first into spring/summer (here in Florida, of course, it is sort of both at the same time), I can’t help but think about the upcoming stormy season and the weather it brings. Days when the sun will be high in the clear blue sky.

And then, almost like clockwork, the afternoon clouds roll in. The dark, ominous foreshadowing of a thunderstorm on its way. When the storm hits, it will range anywhere from a 15 minute sprinkle to a thunderstorm that can last a few hours. But one of the things we love/hate about Florida and its predictable afternoon showers, is that it always clears and the blue sky tends to return before the end of the day.

These daily, relatively minor storms come and go with little consequence. Most of us remain prepared, keeping an umbrella in our car and making sure we avoid puddles in the road. And while the storms are little more than an annoyance to us, they tend to be very good for the environment. The trees and grass seem to shine green in response to the rain and sunshine.

Hurricanes, on the other hand, bring a different feeling. The power and duration of the hurricane causes stress and trepidation for many, even life long Floridians. When those clouds come rolling in, you can see the strength you know that you are in for a storm that could last all day and night, and cause damage that could take weeks to repair.

These storms are different than the daily, afternoon thunderstorms we typically experience. Our typical interventions and strategies of umbrellas and dancing around puddles are not effective here. Instead, we must hunker down, ride the storm out, and see what is left in the morning.

Oaks and Willows

After a hurricane, most of us step outside with a little anxiety. I almost imagine it being like Noah stepping out of the ark for the first time. What is left? We know that there is a strong probability that things are different, but how bad is it going to be? How difficult will it be to recover?

As a lifelong Floridian, you come to expect some collateral damage. Trees may be uprooted, limbs will litter the ground, and any piece of lawn furniture you failed to secure is, well, gone.

A number of years ago, I remember going outside after a hurricane and remembering a story my uncle used to tell us in church. A story about the oaks and the willows.

In the story, Uncle Mike told us about how oak trees are strong and powerful. They are sturdy and very nearly immoveable. He gave examples from our personal lives, where we had to remove an oak tree and how it took so many of us – in addition to some powerful vehicles – to completely remove the mighty oak.

He then told us about the willow. Now, the willow is not nearly as sturdy as the oak. Sure it can withstand some punishment, but unlike the oak, who stands firm and tall, the willow sways and waves with the wind, almost like it is dancing. These differences are even emphasized by the adjectives we use to describe the “Proud Oak” and the “Weeping Willow.”

As Uncle Mike continued in his story – and like I am doing here – he talked about the way in which the two trees respond to storms. Both the oak and the willow manage the daily storms relatively well. There are no major issues, they seem to be well adapted to these interruptions in their regularly scheduled sun basking. The oak, remains firm and immoveable, while the willow, sways and shifts with the winds.

And while these trees manage the daily storms well, hurricanes are a different story. You see, while oaks are tall and strong, their rigidity does not bode well with very strong storms that last for long periods of time. While they can withstand the first few bands from the hurricane, as the ground softens from the rain, their rigidity works against them. And while they may never break, the end up being pushed over, roots and all.

Willows, on the other hand, manage such storms differently. While they remain firmly planted in the ground, they adjust, sway, and move with the winds. In fact, if you ever brave the weather and watch the trees during a strong storm, willows are often pushed to a point where they look as though they are laying on the ground. Yet, when the wind dies down, they stand right back up. Their flexibility allows them to survive even the strongest of storms.

Which Will You Be?

In our lives, we can choose to be either an oak or a willow. Sure, we can be the immoveable, proud oak. One who firmly holds onto our views, perspectives, expectations, and beliefs. And while that may work most days and allow you to weather most of the daily struggles life throws your way, how does it do against the unpredictable and powerful hurricane? How will you manage conflicts that do not respond to your power? How will you manage the unrelenting pressure of the storm?

Or you can be a willow. While you may appear weak as compared to the oak, you are still firmly planted in your own beliefs and perspectives. However, your flexibility and adaptability allow you to adjust to the strongest of storms, the most difficult challenges life puts in your way. Instead of fighting against the wind, you move with it, accepting it, and adjusting to new ideas and pressures. Sure you may end up returning to exactly the same position you were in before, but you may also adjust slightly and change some of your previously held beliefs and perspectives.

While the oak’s mission is to endure through strength and rigidity, the willow’s goal is to adapt through flexibility and adjustment. For many, the difference is not as imperative. Perhaps your life has relatively few hurricanes, so to live life as an oak has worked for you and will continue to do so into the foreseeable future. However, when that unexpected “storm of the century” heads your way, how will you respond? Will you remain the oak, risking being uprooted and toppled? Or will you adapt and adjust, like the willow, and be sure to recover and remain long after the storm has passed?

So as you think about your life, you can make the decision. Which do you want to be? The Oak or The Willow?